Slide O’ Slime

An obstacle course? Pleaseeeeeeeee! You think a Jedi can’t handle that? Jedi training is more than just using the force and learning to use a saber. For Force sake, we have Sarlacc pit in the basement areas! We have to walk it on a tight rope! Many a good Padawan was lost that way.

I took a moment to meditate before going through the gate. I reached out and sensed everything before me. Traps, no problem, flamethrowers, a joke, wild water, yes! And then… slime? A slide of slime? ACK!

I pushed the thought of it away.

The traps were super easy. I could sense them before I reached them. So I avoided those. Loved the quicksand, I jumped right over it. And as for the flamethrowers, my lightsaber ate those blasts like candy. The whole course was easy until…

I got to the slide o’ slime. I froze. I stood on the platform over it and stared down at it. It was green, bubbled and it smelt like Jaba Hutt’s bathroom and looked just as nasty. I wrinkled my nose. I had to slide down this to get out?

There are some things a Jedi Knight should never have to do.

Slides of slime are high up on the list.

“You better move it,” a voice in my head told me.

“Shut up, bucket brain,” I muttered.

“Just imagine you are a Georgia Swamp chicken and go!” he snorted in my head.

A what????

After a shiver of disgust I did. I slide down, slime hitting my face, going up my nose! So gross! I’ll never get it out my nose, I swear! I bounced, almost rolled over on my sides a few times. There was something in the slime… I don’t know what it was but it dark green and stuck to me as I slogged through it.

At the bottom, my feet hit a rock and flipped up in the air. I came down face first in the slime! It went up my nose, in my mouth, in my ears! I jumped up and screamed, “EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!”

“Slam dunk!” a small kid-like voice said in my head, laughing.

“Slime dunk, you mean,” said bucket head.

I really hate those two right now.

I went green. No pun intended. Maybe I should say, greener…

I lost my lunch.

That was green, too.

Excuse me; I need to go shower…again.