Friday, May 4, 2007

Mission Two

Mr. Bennet and Lieutenant Oneida pair up to help their team win the scavenger hunt challenge...

The two arrive on Fire Island 9, somewhat safely. Oneida is shocked to see that the Horizon Amphitheater had sold out to corporate sponsorship and since been renamed the New and Improved Verizon Amphitheater. After signing up for cellphone service, the pair begins their covert operation.

Bennet and Oneida sneak across the the lawn of the New and Improved Verizon Amphitheater. Oneida inconspicuously kicks the door down. They enter the amphitheater with the stealth of a rabid Tibetan feline.

Mr. Bennet grabs a keychain off a fancy display stand and drops a ream of paper in its place. "Got it! Let's go."

"Wait! Let's get Jon's Intergalactic Speedos too."


"Well, we're going after a sea serpent next. We might need to swim."

"Okay, grab 'em and go."

Onedia grabs the speedos and begins walking to the exit. But something catches her eye.

"Let's take this Official Chair of the Intergalactic Roundtable (Which is More Square than Round)!"

"What could we possibly need that for?"

"I get tired easily. It'd be nice to have a place to sit."

"Well, that is a good reason. Now can we go?"

"And this Thermos!"

"We don't have time! Let's go."

"But I need it!"

"Fine! I'll wait outside."

Several minutes pass. Mr. Bennet waits impatiently on the amphitheater steps. Finally, Oneida comes out holding the chair, the speedos, the thermos, a computer mouse, a wooden toothpick, a discarded bag of Cheetos, a lollipop, Jon's Intergalactic Grandmother and a cookie tray.

"It's about time!" Bennet yells. He takes off walking quickly. Oneida slowly makes her way down the steps with the load of memorabilia weighing her down. "Come on! We're in a race. Sheesh!"

They start off running toward the dropship, but suddenly Bennet stops. "What is it?" Oneida asks, her head spying through the chair's legs.

"This key....on the keychain, I think it's to that." Bennet points out to the Fire Island 9 Docks. There is a large yacht anchored nearby. "We need a marine vehicle. Come on!"

The two board Jon's Intergalactic Yacht o' Gladiatoring and set sail for the serpent. "So, how do we catch a serpent?" Bennet asks.

Oneida replies, "You have to coax him until he rises up out of the sea. Then, you can grab hold of him and pull really hard, but be careful of his secretions. It causes paralysis."

"Yeah, well, I'm not doing any of that."

"The keychain has a shiny bobble on it. Serpents like shiny stuff. Try using it."

Bennet holds the keychain off the side of the Intergalactic Yacht o' Gladiatoring and it begins sparkling in the sunlight. Suddenly, the sea starts spinning. Waves smash into the Intergalactic Yacht o' Gladiatoring and a huge sea serpent leaps out at Mr. Bennet.

"Look out!" Oneida screams. She punches Bennet in the nose and he falls onto the deck. The serpent glides over the entire Intergalactic Yacht o' Gladiatoring and she manages to grab a scale from its hide.

"Gah! I landed on the keychain and broke the little bobble," Bennet says, getting to his feet. "Hey, look!"

"What is it?"

"It's a sea serpent scale. It was inside the bobble. No wonder it was so shiny. Guess we don't need to worry about that beast."

Oneida holds up the scale she retrieved. "Too late."

"Oh, well. Maybe we'll get extra credit."

* * *

Meanwhile, the sea serpent sits alone in his throne at his wet home.

"You will pay! Both of you will pay," it bellows maniacally, "with your lives!"


Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

I don't know what's up with that big boat, I'm not a big flashy boat kind of guy. The producers thought it would be nice, though, and I'm not paying for it, so what the hey.

I highly recommend the speedos, though. They're so smooth and comofortable.

Dark Jedi Kriss said...

Speedos? All of you in speedos? o.o

Nathan Petrelli said...

I'm glad that it worked out with the serpent the way it did. The thought of Bennet in speedos is disturbing.

On the other hand, "Look out!" Oneida screams. She punches Bennet in the nose and he falls onto the deck."

I find that funny for some

Synth-Lin said...

Speedos if you have the right body they look great. If you don't it should be a crime.

There are other rules for Speedos too as I found out on youtube

Love you all (even the speedo wearers)


Gyrobo said...

It's best not to upset the sea serpents. They're a very litigious people.

Henchman432 said...

How much stuff did you steal...umm...take.

Professor Xavier said...

Interesting twist there at the end where Oneida snaps and belts her partner in the nose. I'm sorry we didn't get to see Oneida in a bikini though.

Erifia Apoc said...

Mr. Bennete doesn't know, nor care what MTG cards are.

Nice choice in someone to work with, now start dating her. Good post, I love the pics.

Congratulations upon completetion.

Erifia Apoc said...

Of course by Bennete, I mean Bennet...

Mr. Bennet said...

MTG cards scare me.