Wednesday, April 25, 2007

challenge 1

I run up to the ship. And of course the one assigned to me has smoke comin' out of it. I thought it was the engine , but no the smoke was coming from the pilot.

" Hey man! Want a hit?" He asks putting something in my face.

" um no....I answer. " Wait your flying on drugs?"

" Not drugs ,man!"

" Oh think goodness ." I Sigh.

" It's just incense to clean out the smell of space vodka!"

Good thing I'm invulnerable I think to myself. I get in despite every survival instinct I have telling me not to. He starts it up and we go ....sideways.

After nearly killing half of the bystanders, he slams into the Old Gladiator's Home. An old guy is hanging on the wind shield. "

" Hey man get him unstuck from there!" I demand. He turns on the windshield wipers. smacking the poor guy in the face.

" I'm gonna get you inta the arm lock ya whipper snapper!" The gladiator shouts.

The marine splashes the ship into the nearby ocean. The old guy was dislodged, and cursing us from the middle of the sea.

" Man ya didn't have to nearly kill him! " I shout.

" You wanted him off didn't You? Now we go down to the space station. "

" Up! Up! Opposite of down!" After a grueling few minutes He actually goes into space, going away from the station.

" Hey! Our goal's that way!" I kick his seat.

He chugs some vodka. " I know where I'm goin!"

I use the one power I have that Superman doesn't, Tactile Telekinesis and turn the ship around. I should have kept control of the the craft, because he crashes into the station's galley.

I jump out of the ship. Grab some aliens floating into space, then weld the hull with Heat vision. Some alien starts shouting at me. I point at my pilot. " Issue all complaints to that drunk!"

I use some X-ray vision, and find the space pods. The one that says "Kon-El. " Has a key turn ignition. Great Krypton! Why do I get the cheap one? I turn the key, and get what sounds like a car dying. Oh forget this!

I kick out the floor ,and rip out the engine, and fly it out under my own power. The slalom course, and the buoys were easy. Around the moon of Hacknor though I hear "wocka wocka wocka!"

Wait, a second am I supposed to be hearing things in space? And am I about to be attacked by Fozzy Bear? No It's worse but not by much.

After about fifteen minutes of the chase, I finally lose him in the Asteroid field when the thing busied itself eating chunks of rock. On reentry I realize I tore out the shields.

Ow! This burns. I finally crash on the finish line. I brush off the slag that used to be my escape pod, Synth Lin comments " I can see your happy to see me."

" Huh?"

She points down. Oh great. Reentry burned off my clothes, Why do I have to be the only one wearing an "S" Shield without semi invulnerable Kryptonian clothes? If any body needs me I'm gonna be hiding in my room in shame.


Erifia Apoc said...

That Poor Old Guy. Interesting use of Liquor for sure... Drinking and driving has never occured to me. Kids these days.

Nice use of Telekenesis. Poor use of clothes. It wouldn't have been so bad if you weren't singed with ash.

Gyrobo said...

Best... Pacman... picture... ever.

Dark Jedi Kriss said...

Thank the Force I DIDNT see that thing! My luck, it would have chomped me.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Why are you hiding in shame? You are such a strapping young lad.

I mean, go put a pair of pants on you wierdo.

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Maybe he was shmed cuz he didn't look like the man of steel, just the man of over cooked aspargus.

Kon-El said...

Nah More like because I was happy to see a robot, I don't wanna be Magneto!

Synth-Lin said...

I'm beautiful. I'm Attractive. Your a melting pot of testosterone. Of course your going react that way. Its only natural. Its the best standing ovation a girl can get.

Professor Xavier said...

Tactile telekenisis? You made that up.

Kon-El said...

Nope professor my creators did.

Simon said...

It's kind of like watching Dumb and Dumber without the laughs.

Kon-El said...

Simon: Wait a sec why are you wearing Robin's costume? Are you the guy that stole it form the tower and left creepy love notes too him?