Thursday, July 5, 2007

Time trippin'

Ladies and Gents,

For the final throw down. Dark Jedi Kriss picked my Challenge.


" You will go on a pilgrimage to the past."

That means time travel. ( I hate time travel, I always come back with a rash.)

"There you will make a life-changing decision you must stick to for the rest of your life. Must be major, changing your hair color won’t work.Must be profound."

Gee, like what? I going to stop being a supervillain henchman? I think not. (Even the heroes don't act like heroes anymore. I'm looking at you, Iron Man.)

"In this pilgrimage there must be:a door you go through three times."

(A door and going through three times...? WTF? you have to be kidding me.)

"A ghost (not Petrelil, don’t even try it)"

(I wouldn't even dare to try and talk to Petrelil, he's a perv.)

"A spoon."


"And you must lose one article of clothing for every hour you are in the past.I know what you are thinking. What the polly-wog-a-ding-dong was she thinking?I’m was thinking Hench will be in his underpants when he comes back.I’m counting on it.Good luck, honey bee."

(Great. So she is a prev also. Was there anyone in this contest at isn't. Ok, yes I am a perv too. There are you happy.)

I check the grounds of the LGS compound and there is no time travel gear here. (Shocker.) I call the one person who has always helped me out in a jam.


He has always been at my side. When I needed anything, Bam it was there. Even though with LGS I, Amazing Mutant Race 3 and LGS II, I have become the face of A.I.M. He has gotten jealous. He's my bud.

Moddy boom tubes, himself and something called a "Time Travel Door". (Wow, that's weird.)

I step in and end up in to...Feudal Japan.

To the times of Shogan's and Warlords. (Sweet, I'm going to run this land.)

I head to the top of the hill and see nothing great. It's a small village. The next town is miles away and I don't speak the language. (Frag) This sucks, I walk around of a bit and feel something strange. My gloves disappears. (Omg, she wasn't joking.) I see the next "Time Door". I make a sprint for it. I jump in and...

End up in the 1930's. Well, this is a little better. People here know, I am not so freak speaking gibberish.

"Hey Mister, where are ya' pants." A half pint yells out.

Great, I jog to the nearest men's store and steal a pair of pants. Now the fuzz is after me. The moment I landed here. I just wanted to hang at a speak easy and pick a dame. Before I can plan on doing anything in this timeline. The "Door" appears.

I fall out and look at my surrounding. I find out two things.

1. It's in color.

2. It's nice and warm. I scan and see it's Miami in the 80's.

Well the chicks are hot.

I contact M.O.D.O.K.

"Hey Moddy, I am going to have some fun around here for awhile. Keep the "Door" open for a bit ok?" I ask of him.

He replies. "No."

"What?" I asked, I was blown away.

He goes and a tear about, he is the face of A.I.M. No one else should be top dog but him. He destroys the "Door."

I'm stuck here. My clothes are almost gone. I am going to Kill M.O.D.O.K., when I get back. Now I just have to figure how to get back.

Magdalena's ghost comes to me and tells me the only thing that can get me back home is a spoon.

I grab one from a nearby dinner and nothing. I wait...and wait..Nothing. Spoon, why did I need a spoon? Who thinks a spoon will help me.

"SPOON" I scream.

The Tick comes running out of nowhere and breaks a hole in the timesteam. Sending my body to return to Hacknor. and Just in time.

My betrayal by M.O.D.O.K. will make me change my tag line.

Denatl for All.

M.O.D.O.K. sucks.


Dark Jedi Kriss said...

Good use of the Tick there. SPOOOOOOOOOON!

Synth-Lin said...

Spoon What kind of war cry is that?

Oh well at least you did get down to your underwear.

Nice glutes

Love you all


corbiscide said...

MODOK is a loser.

He's always trying to overcompensate of his lack of appendages.

Vote 1 Henchy.

He's an original character. All new and not a Jedi.

Wow! Variety.

Vegeta said...

Ghost of Magdelna. She's dead now? hnmph Just somewhere else I have to go on funeral day. Meh we weren't that close, I'll send flowers.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

You look a little bit like Shia LaBeouf there, I'm just sayin'

And does MODOK need some sun or does MODOK need some sun?

Ghost of Congressman Nathan Petrelli said...

I just want to state, for the record, I AM NOT A PERV. The evidence is circumcision...?
Just because a guy has a kid out of wedlock, a fling with a stripper, & occasionally strokes the face of a male nurse does not make him a perv...?
Well...nice post...